All over the world...they're analyzing CHANNEL 9

THEN SUPERIMPOSE:

                                    over-
          All over the world...they're analyzing CHANNEL 9
                                      ^

FADE OUT. FADE IN:

MOVIE FOOTAGE: A LITTLE ROMANCE (1979): Opening sequence, where we watch scenes from American films dubbed into French. ROOSTER COGBURN (John Wayne) and NED PEPPER (Robert Duvall) face off across an open field in a scene from TRUE GRIT. SUBTITLES appear at the bottom of the screen throughout.

                      ROOSTER COGBURN
          Je vais vous tuer en une
          minute, Ned. Ou voyez que vous
          avez accroche a la convenance
          de Judge Parker. Que sera-t-
          elle?

                      SUBTITLE
          The act of viewing "Home
          Shopping Club" is a paradigm
          one step removed from the
          paradigm of TV-watching as a
          whole

                      NED PEPPER
          J'appelle que bold parlez pour
          un gros homme borgne.

                      SUBTITLE
          Wittgenstein knew this when he
          wrote his TRACTATUS, even
          though TV didn't exist

                      ROOSTER COGBURN
          Remplissez vos mains, vous
          fils d'une chienne!

                      SUBTITLE
          If he were to rewrite it
          today, "Watching Channel 9"
          would be a new, eighth
          proposition for philosophical
          analysis. Discuss

Cogburn and Pepper charge towards each other, guns blazing.

CUT TO:

MOVIE FOOTAGE: More from the opening scene of A LITTLE ROMANCE (1979): SUNDANCE (Robert Redford) and BUTCH CASSIDY (Paul Newman) are about to escape by jumping into the river, in a dubbed scene from BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID (1969). Again, subtitles appear throughout.

                      SUNDANCE
          Ne je veux pas.

                      SUBTITLE
          NEWHART

                      BUTCH CASSIDY
          Quoi?

                      SUBTITLE
          Is what?

                      SUNDANCE
          Je veux les combattre!

                      SUBTITLE
          A prime example

                      BUTCH CASSIDY
          Il vont vous tuer.

                      SUBTITLE
          Of what comedy?

                      SUNDANCE
          Peut-être.

                      SUBTITLE
          Mid-1980s -

                      BUTCH CASSIDY
          Voulez-vous mourir?

                      SUBTITLE
           - family-oriented -

                      SUNDANCE
          Vous?

                      SUBTITLE
           - pop nihilism.

                      BUTCH CASSIDY
          D'accord.

                      SUBTITLE
          Very good.

                      BUTCH CASSIDY
               (continued)
          Je sauterai d'abord.

                      SUBTITLE
          The show's laugh track is, of
          course, unnecessary, Sundance.¹

                      SUNDANCE
          Non.

                      SUBTITLE
          Yet its presence as a tool for
          audience manipulation
          shouldn't be unexpected in the
          context of corporate
          entertainment in the mid-
          1980s, Butch.²

                      BUTCH CASSIDY
          Alors, c'est toi qui commence.

                      SUBTITLE
          Still, the aura of
          unpleasantness it gives off is
          enough to repel most casual
          viewers, indeed many dedicated
          fans. It imposes itself on the
          viewer at the most awkward
          moments, Sundance.³

                      SUNDANCE
          Non, je resterai.

                      SUBTITLE
          And the fact that the laugh
          track is still in use today
          indicates a lack of audience
          sophistication. Furthermore,
          there is a distinct lack of
          satiric criticism of the
          laugh track. Historically few
          artists have lampooned the
          people who use it or the
          situations in which it is
          found, Butch.⁴

                      BUTCH CASSIDY
          Quel est votre problème?

                      SUBTITLE
          Actually, Sundance, there's
          been considerable lampooning
          of the laugh track in
          television and the movies in
          the last twenty years - Woody
          Allen's ANNIE HALL in 1977, or
          Billy Crystal's DON'T GET ME
          STARTED in 1988, for example.
          Both savagely parodied
          artificial laughter placement:
          respectively, in the context
          of a popular TV chat show, and
          the context of an antiquated
          lounge comedian's stage act.⁵

                      SUNDANCE
          Je ne sais pas nager! Voila!

                      SUBTITLE
          Quod erat demonstrandum.

NEWMAN laughs bitterly.

                      BUTCH CASSIDY
          Etes-vous fou? La chute vous
          tuera probablement!

                      SUBTITLE
          Your argument is complete
          garbage!

They both JUMP.

                      SUNDANCE
          Ohhhhhh....chaaaaaaa!

                      SUBTITLE
          There goes my thesis!

FADE OUT. CAPTIONS fade up over black:

          BIBLIOGRAPHY

          1. Patmos, David. "Newhart:
          Artificial Pathos." PERSPECTIVES IN
          COMEDY ANALYSIS v31 n6 pp18-29

          2. Jenkins, Yolanda. "The Laugh
          Track: The Last Nail in the
          Corporate Comedy Coffin."
          PERSPECTIVES IN COMEDY ANALYSIS v23
          n8 pp36-60

          3. ibid.

          4. Parker, Matthew. "I've got a
          notion." NEW YORK TIMES v281 Sept
          1968 pg D1

          5. ibid.

FADE OUT.