FADE IN on the interior of a Quiznos restaurant franchise. A CASHIER stands behind the register. To his right is an assembly line of ATTENDANTS making sandwiches. A CUSTOMER comes to the head of the line. Both CASHIER and CUSTOMER enunciate their words as if they were talking to speech-recognition software.

                      CASHIER
          Hello, and welcome to
          Quiznos. Here is your
          sandwich, which you ordered
          earlier.

                      CUSTOMER
          Thank you... When did I order
          this?

                      CASHIER
          Before the beginning of this
          scene.

                      CUSTOMER
          That's right. What is my
          total?

                      CASHIER
          Your total is $5.39.

The customer hands him two bills.

                      CUSTOMER
          Here. I am handing you a $50
          and a $1. My reason is that
          it's laundry night.

                      CASHIER
          Ha! It happens to the best of
          us, sir. So, from $61, then.

                      CUSTOMER
          Actually I gave you $51.

                      CASHIER
               (beat)
          So I should give you back...?

                      CUSTOMER
          Um...$45.61?

The cashier hands him two bills and closes the drawer.

                      CASHIER
          Fine, sir. Here are two
          twenties and a five.

                      CUSTOMER
          No, you see, that is a one,
          not a five.

The customer holds up the $1.

                      CASHIER
               (beat)
          How much did you give me?

                      CUSTOMER
          $51.

                      CASHIER
               (beat)
          So I should give you back...

                      CUSTOMER
          $45.61.

                      CASHIER
          Fine.

The cashier rings up the sale again, and hands the customer his change.

                      CASHIER
          Here is your change. I'll
          just ring that up again.

                      CUSTOMER
          Thank you.

                      CASHIER
               (not moving)
          What did you order?

                      CUSTOMER
          The Black Angus. Very tasty.

The cashier waits sixty seconds. Finally the sandwich comes down the assembly line. An attendant hands it to him.

                      CASHIER
          That'll be $45.61.

                      CUSTOMER
          I just paid.

                      CASHIER
               (angrily)
          Why didn't you say so?... The
          Alexandrian Library remains
          missing.

The cashier exits.

                      CUSTOMER
          Thanks for the tip!

The customer exits.

END.